No matter how successful we may be in other areas of life, little of that matters if we do not have the attention and affection of a romantic partner.  What good is having millions of dollars in the bank, a mansion overlooking the city, and the finest clothes if you don't have someone special to share it with?

For much of my life, I was a 'loner'.  I kept to myself, rarely went out on dates, and often spent my free time reading books or watching movies.  For a while, I enjoyed the 'freedom', but it soon grew tiresome, and I realized that life is better when it's shared.

Although I struggled for many years, I have since found a secret, that when put into action, instantly increases your attractiveness to others.

What IS Attractiveness?

As usual, before I describe the actual process for instantly increasing your attractiveness, I want to give you the extra benefit of KNOWING the principles upon which the process is based.  This way, you can create your own processes that will be just as effective, and avoid any suggestions that are not based on solid principles.

Attractiveness is about more than physical looks.  It's also in the way we carry ourselves, the way we communicate with others, and the 'vibes' that we send out into the world around us.

We've all seen people who were not physically attractive, yet were able to attract to themselves lots of friends and lovers.  Some people mistakenly assume that the person in question must have lots of money, or have some other advantage that is not easily created.  While this may be the case in SOME circumstances, it's not always the case.

This is best demonstrated with a story.  Here's one about a person I once knew personally, so I know it's true.

Dan seemed to be very popular with the ladies.  He was average-looking.  A few scars from a living a hard life, a few pounds overweight, and his attention to grooming was not always the best.  Working at a U-Haul retail location, he was not a rich person, yet earned enough to get by.

He never let any of this bother him, though, and every week he'd go out to the bars to have fun with 'the boys'.  At least a couple of times each month, he'd meet someone new, and more often than not, he'd end up taking her home for the night.  Heck, I remember hearing him talk about getting phone numbers from women he met practically anywhere, like the grocery store, post office, or laundrymat.

No, Dan didn't have good looks or lots of money, but he did have something about him that was highly attractive.

I've known several people in my life like Dan.  They all have a few things in common.

First, they all have a sense of confidence about themselves.  They know they're not the best people on the planet, but then again, only 1 person can be "the best".  They don't expect to run into anyone who is really any better than they are, so they know they're "good enough" for the people they do meet.

Second, they are comfortable talking with others.  Since they are confident in themselves, and confident that others will accept them as they are, they are also confident that there's nothing wrong with starting a conversation with someone new.  By extension, they are also confident that there's no subject they cannot talk about, and will quickly jump to intimate details if they feel like it.  Another reason they are comfortable talking with others is because they simply LIKE other people.

Third, they also have a healthy sense of humor.  They are able to make fun of themselves, people in authority, and any situation in which they find themselves.  They are not cruel in their amusement, and often use their humor to lighten up any tension they find.  However, they are not generally jokesters, and know that it's important to be sincere, especially when giving compliments and expressing appreciation.

And finally, they tend to have lots of energy, expressing it as genuine enthusiasm and excitement.  Sometimes, it's a quite enthusiasm, without all the bouncing off the walls we tend to associate with high-energy, excitable people.

Pareto Principle At Work

As with most things, there is an 80/20 relationship involved.  80% of your results will come from using 20% of the above principles.  In this case, the important 20% is confidence.  When you are confident in yourself and your ability to relate well with others, you will gain an immense increase in your attractiveness.

Actually, most of the other principles grow out of confidence, and will therefore increase along with an increase in confidence.  As you become more confident in yourself, and your worth as a person, you will automatically feel more at ease talking with other people, and you'll relax and allow your natural humor spring forth.

Putting This Into Action

One of the easiest and quickest ways to create confidence in yourself is something I teach in my Choose To Believe material.  NLP enthusists will recognize this as a technique called "pacing and leading", where you 'pace' your current beliefs to elicit a strong feeling of confidence, and then 'lead' that confidence into new areas.

The first step is to remind yourself of a few things in which you already have a lot of confidence.  Most people have absolute confidence that 2+2=4, and that they are now living on planet Earth.  By affirming these things, you elicit a strong feeling of confidence within yourself.

Try it now.  Repeat the following statements to yourself, aloud if possible:

• I believe that 2+2=4.
• I believe that I am alive.
• I believe that I am now living on planet Earth.
• I believe that the sky is blue.
• I believe that I know my own name.

As you repeated the above statements, you most likely had a feeling inside of "Of course these things are true.  They're FACTS!"  This feeling is the essence of confidence, which we'll put to good use in just a moment.

Also notice how much time it took you to say this list of statements.  Less than 15 seconds, perhaps?

The second step in this process is to 'affirm' what you'd like to be true.  For example:

• I believe that I am as valuable a person as anyone else.
• I believe that people like me and accept me as I am.
• I believe that I am a lovable person.
• I believe that Life is full of happy surprises.
• I believe that I am lucky in love.

In practice, this comes together as:

• I believe that 2+2=4.
• I believe that I am alive.
• I believe that I am now living on planet Earth.
• I believe that the sky is blue.
• I believe that I know my own name.
• I believe that I am as valuable a person as anyone else.
• I believe that people like me and accept me as I am.

Notice that there are 5 pacing statements and only 2 leading statements.  This is a good balance, because the pacing statements will bring up a strong feeling of confidence, which will carry over and become attached in your mind with the leading statements.

Finally, repeat the series of pacing and leading statements 3 or 4 times, which should take you about a minute to do.  Do it now and notice how much more confident you feel.

In just 60 seconds, you have now increased your self-confidence, and by extension, your attractiveness to others.  The only thing left to do is to repeat the process from time to time to maintain this increased confidence, especially when you want to attract someone of the opposite sex.

Alan Tutt, author of "Choose To Believe: A Practical Guide to Living Your Dreams", offers a set of 4 free reports, including "How To Get Maximum Results From the Law of Attraction," "How To Be Happy Every Day," "What's Holding You Back?" and "Effortless Power."  To claim your copy of these life-transforming reports, go to http://www.PowerKeysPub.com/gifts.